Comments for Paul Jenner

Comment on NLP Isn’t Always The Solution by Pat Dixon

Pat Dixon — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 02:18:36 +0000

You were so right. Just last week I had my first NLP session with a friend who has helped performers with stagefright. I helped to some extent, but in the process, it dawned on me how much I have unintentionally practised and rehearsed the fear every time I talked about it or thought about it. I’ve now been to three Toastmasters meetings, and will be seeing another specialized expert in January. My goal is to beat this before the end of 2012, ahead of any other goals (and there are a few! So thanks again for your contibution to change! It becomes less terrifying and more exciting with each passing week. p.

Comment on What Makes You Happy? by eva

eva — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 11:13:10 +0000

what makes me happy?
when I am in a good mood, a lot of little things can make me happy, will give me some energie. And then, its my turn to make other peoples happy…. and it will give me some energie!!!
When I a’m feeling down, I boost myself with a good walk, or some dancing, something fysic, so that afterwards I’m realy tiered, have a good sleep, and when I wake up, I feel fine.

Comment on Prevent Erectile Dysfunction by Pat

Pat — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 20:35:49 +0000

You really are very funny. I’m forwarding this to hubby!

Comment on Helen Mirren And Me by Pat

Pat — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 20:13:34 +0000

This was hilarious, encouraging, and educational all in a few paragraphs! I guess we’ll have to buy some of your books

Pat

Comment on Too Much Sex? by Sue Germain

Sue Germain — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 15:49:17 +0000

This clip made me laugh and really brightened up a foggy november afternoon. It seems you can have too much of a good thing afterall! I wonder if the reaction would have been the same if the genders were reversed?

Comment on Am I Weird? by Paul Jenner

Paul Jenner — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:27:40 +0000

Hi Dale,
You’ve really put me on the spot here because I don’t believe anybody, man or woman, should be pressured into doing something sexual they don’t want to do. You’re using me to influence your girlfriend. But the simple answer is, yes, lots of men who haven’t seen it are fascinated by the way women pee. I even heard of a man who put on a diving mask to see close up (it didn’t work because he couldn’t see out through the splashing on the glass). I think you’re right to take the step-by-step approach. But your girlfriend has a perfect right to refuse.

Comment on Withholding Ejaculation by Paul Jenner

Paul Jenner — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:24:36 +0000

Hi Julia ,
This is a problem that crops up quite often when women have been used to what you call ‘normal’ sex. There’s one answer for older men and a slightly different answer for younger men, and from what you say I infer that your partner is an older man. Given that, you have to bear in mind that he may not be able to ejaculate very often. So it’s not a case of deciding between what you call ‘normal’ sex and non-ejaculatory sex. It’s a case of deciding between sex and no sex.
For example, let’s say he can ejaculate once a week. In that case, if you stick to ‘normal’ sex, you can have your waves crashing simultaneously on the beach once a week. And that’s it. The rest of the time you can’t have sex at all. However, if you introduce non-ejaculatory sessions to your repertoire you can have them in addition to your ‘normal’ sessions, not instead of. You still get exactly the same number of simultaneous crashing waves and you get a whole load of other waves as well.
Of course, it may be your partner is capable of ejaculating more often. But the principle still applies. The non-ejaculatory sessions can be additional sessions.
In fact, there are also good reasons for a younger and more virile man to withhold ejaculation. After ejaculation a man’s hormone levels can change drastically for the worse. Instead of feeling loving and romantic (as you’d imagine after a nice lovemaking session) he may become distant and irritable. This ‘sexual hangover’ is all the more marked in an older man. And he can’t altogether help it because he’s go to battle against his hormones if he’s to overcome it.
Let’s look at this from another angle. Your partner is making love to you the ‘Tantric’ way. His brain is swimming in dopamine as he enjoys one ‘mini-orgasm’ after another. He’s unlikely to volunteer to stop because it’s all too beautiful. So you have three possible ways of stopping him. You can do something so incredibly exciting that he just can’t avoid ejaculating. You can invite him to ejaculate simultaneously with your orgasm. Or you can indicate that you’re completely satisfied and don’t want to continue.
Now, when you think about it, they’re all different ways of you stopping him. It’s all the same in the end. So which would he prefer? Well, if he hasn’t ejaculated for a while I’m sure he’ll enjoy it very much. In fact, there are going to be times, of course, when he’s desperate to ejaculate. But if he ejaculates when he didn’t really want to (and can’t then make love again for a while) his pleasure may be tainted by a certain feeling of disappointment. So most of the time he’s going to prefer it if you bring the session to an end by saying you’re satisfied.
Let me reassure you that he’s not going to mind at all, for two reasons. Firstly, most men feel a stupid kind of pride in the idea that they’ve sated their partners (particularly bearing in mind that women can normally outlast men by a wide margin). So just tell him that and he’ll be thrilled. Something along these lines will do nicely: ‘You’ve made me orgasm so many times I just can’t come any more. You are fantastic.’ Secondly, he’ll know that several mini-orgasms give him far, far more pleasure than one ejaculation and he’ll simply be very, very grateful for what he’s had. Believe me. And look forward to the next time, very soon. Because – and this is perhaps the most crucial point of all – he will still desire you. And that’s not often the case after a man has ejaculated.
As to the sessions lacking ‘form’, well, you can give them form, if you wish. For example, oral followed by man on top, followed by doggy, followed by girl on top as the finale. Or agree that you’ll stop at 08.30 or whatever. But isn’t it beautiful to be utterly lost in a rapture that has, in a sense, no beginning and no end?
I hope this helps.

Comment on My Tantric Sex Present For William And Kate by Sarah Nesbit

Sarah Nesbit — Sat, 07 May 2011 10:00:26 +0000

You’re supposed to be an expert on happiness and to want people to be happy. So why are you criticising people for being happy about the wedding of William and Kate? Just because you didn’t enjoy it doesn’t mean that other people can’t. If it made people happy, that’s good.

Comment on Your Mind Is Your Aphrodisiac by Tim Jenkins

Tim Jenkins — Sun, 17 Apr 2011 09:41:50 +0000

I followed your advice last night and was absolutely astonished by the result. My girlfriend got more turned on than I’ve ever known when I introduced the idea of her sharing a changing room with another girl. Soon she was fantasizing about trying on one another’s clothes, then one another’s underwear, then, well, you can imagine… I had the best sex ever but now I have a worry in the back of my mind – Is my girlfriend a lesbian?